As someone who writes poetry and believes in the power of words in serving as a tool for broadening people’s horizons, I was internally confused between wanting to do something that dealt on the level of “changing perspectives through spoken word” versus creating real world impact by somehow engaging with Pakistan’s culture in a more tangible manner. While I knew that I would find the latter to be more fulfilling, I was not sure how I could do the latter while being based abroad.
As I pondered upon these questions in my mind, I went to the Museums and Heritage conference in Olympia, London on 11th May, 2022 to see what work organisations in this space are doing and to make connections with potential stakeholders. After speaking to many people and organisations at this conference, I came to learn that a fair amount of work that goes into jobs in this sector is technical, such as interactive storytelling through virtual reality and augmented reality, software for museums, business analytics roles that consult such organisations on ticket pricing and other business-related decisions. All of this made me wonder where I fit in this piece of puzzle, if anywhere at all.
It wasn’t that I was lacking self-belief and questioning my ability to tap into a competitive industry, rather I was pragmatically thinking about what part of this work would I actually enjoy doing? For instance, as much as it is important to do so, I am not passionate about working on storing and moving cultural objects and artefacts, and I am not equipped to do the technical/data-heavy jobs which means that I am not fit for a decent number of jobs in this industry.
Earlier that week, I went to the British Asian film festival on 9th May, 2022 for the same reasons – to see what is out there and meeting potential stakeholders and experts through in-person networking. I was underwhelmed by seeing that there were not many people there. Going to these events and getting a reality check combined with asking myself the difficult but necessary questions about how interested I truly am in this industry and what is it that makes me interested in this industry.
I visited a couple of museums, such as the Victoria & Albert Museum on 8th May, 2022 and the Postal Museum on 27th May, 2022. I found myself more excited and engaged in the museums’ stores (which has always been the case, actually) than while reading boards and visiting exhibits in the museums. I was finally able to give words to what deep inside, I always knew, that I enjoyed engaging with the commercial side of culture/heritage/handicrafts more than the other sides of it.
At the Postal Museum and later at the Wellcome Collection that I visited on 7th June, 2022, I observed something important about myself. For quite some time, I was confusing what I am passionate about/like to support with what I would like to pursue and professionally add value in. For instance, I am passionate about writing poetry, but I do not want to pursue it as a career. Furthermore, my admiration for interactive storytelling and engaging visuals made me think that that is something I would want to do, only for me to realize that neither do I have the technical skillset for it, nor do I want to develop one.
The reason why I was now able to give words to all these reflections that had been living and breathing inside of me is because I was becoming accepting of my confusions and “mini failures”. I was letting go of this self-created expectation that I should have absolute clarity on the path forward and hence, stopped feeling defeated by virtue of my confusions. I was starting to understand the phrase, “the journey is the destination” by detaching myself from the destination and focusing on embracing the process and letting my research question/choices evolve.
